Use this page safely
- View this page using private browsing. This means websites you visit are not stored in your web browsing history
- Press the green 'Exit this page' button below to quickly close this website. Please note this button will not delete your browsing history
- You can clear your browsing history and cookies in your browser settings
Domestic abuse can affect anyone and Castle Point Borough Council is committed to supporting victims, improving safety and working with partners to prevent harm. Abuse can be physical, emotional, psychological, financial, controlling or coercive, and often happens behind closed doors.
In Castle Point, our Community Safety Team works closely with Essex Police, specialist domestic abuse services and local support organisations to help protect victims, provide advice, and connect people with the right support. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, support is available, and you do not have to face it alone.
Read the Council’s Domestic Abuse Policy
What is domestic abuse?
The Home Office defines domestic abuse as:
Any incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive or threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between those aged 16 or over who are, or have been, intimate partners or family members, regardless of gender or sexuality (family members are: mother, father, son, daughter, brother, sister & grandparents; directly-related, in-laws or step-family).
This can encompass, but is not limited to, the following types of abuse:
- psychological or emotional i.e. controlling and coercive behaviour
- physical - violent or threatening
- sexual
- financial/economic abuse - any behaviour that has a substantial adverse effect on someone’s ability to;
a) acquire, use or maintain money or other property, or
b) obtain goods or services
Controlling behaviour is: a range of acts designed to make a person subordinate and/or dependent by isolating them from sources of support, exploiting their resources and capacities for personal gain, depriving them of the means needed for independence, resistance and escape and regulating their everyday behaviour.
Coercive behaviour is: an act or a pattern of acts of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish, or frighten their victim.
Am I being abused?
It may not be easy to recognise that you are being abused. The person abusing you is likely to tell you that it is “your fault” or that “it’s not that bad”. They may try to convince you that it’s perfectly normal or that no-one else would believe you.
You will probably have changed the way you do things to try and maintain calm and keep the abuser happy. However, it is likely that no matter what you do the abuse continues and possibly gets worse, the level of abuse may escalate, and it is likely to happen more often.
Isolation is a key tactic used by abusers to establish power and control, and to try and make you completely dependant on them. An abuser seeking to isolate you may:
- Prevent you from seeing family and friends
- Encourage you to quit your work or study
- Monitor your movements
- Monitor your online activity
- Restrict your access to money
- Deny you access to buy basic necessities
By recognising that you are being abused you can start to identify risks and think about ways you might be able to stay safer.
Help is available
Whether you are currently experiencing domestic abuse, have recently left an abusive relationship or think you may be in an abusive relationship it is important to know you are not alone.
There are services that can help you better understand what is happening to you, they will be able to offer advice on staying safe, provide practical support and help you to work through any decisions you want to make.
Try talking to someone you trust or contact an organisation for support:
Changing Pathways - 01268 729 707
National Centre for Domestic Violence – 0800 970 2070
Essex Compass – 0330 333 7444
Men's Advice Line and Enquiries (MALE) – 0808 801 0327
Broken Rainbow – 0800 999 5428 / 08452 604 460
Next steps
Only leave when it is safe to do so.
Leaving is a process. During this process and the period following separation the risk to you (and your children) is at its highest. If you are thinking of leaving it is important that you have a plan and some support to keep yourself safe.
You may also wish to speak with our Housing Options team, who can offer confidential advice about accessing refuge accommodation and discuss the housing options available to you. Call 01268 882 200 and ask for the Housing Options team.